Valentine's Blues?

Valentines Day 2011.

For a lot of people, today was simply another "Hallmark Holiday," a contrived a shakedown engineered to drive the dollars from the seams of our pants, or maybe just a simple shakedown of our pants, but I digress.

This year for me, it’s different. Because I know now a year is what it takes.

I’ve ALWAYS tried to be honest. To a near FAULT.

For two reasons:

It’s marketable. People GET it.

People relate to my folly. …Cause it’s real.

And TWO.

It’s healing.

I literally stopped in my tracks today.

I missed my ex-girls lips. Specifically the bottom one.

I used to nibble on it. Just for the sake that it was perfect.

And then I breathed.

A little more than a year ago today the ship took on water, and went down.

I really thought I had met the woman I would marry. But all of this came with the understanding that I had grappled with the first pathological liar I had ever fallen for.

You can put many things to test.

Everything, except love.

And then I chuckled. Because I know there will be another.

It’s called healin…

Next year things may be different for me. And yet, maybe not. But I’m not focused any more on what I don't have. Because I have been given so much.

I feel only extremely content and very very grateful for these 24-hours.

Healing happens.

I'm my own Valentine this year. And it sounds incredibly trite, but it feels good to stop for a moment and hug myself.

It's why THIS Valentine’s Day is special to me.

(Photo courtesty of Sarah Wade)